Paytem Jane Management send us the complete interview with some questions that were not published, but don’t forget downloading the magazine in here, where you will find the interview + lot of new pictures of Paytem Jane!
Here you have the translation by Paytem Jane Official Fanclub :
You started since you were very young as a model, and in the meantime receiving lessons to be a dancer and writting songs. Was it the real dream?
It’s THE DREAM. Every single thing I’ve done in my life was for this, and everythins has brought me here. Music has always been beside me. The best of my dream is that, no matter how hard it gets or if there’s nobody to show it up to, nobody can forbide me writting songs, singing or dancing. When I was younger, I used to leave home without my mother’s permission to do it with the breakers, until she noticed and took me to take some lessons. I need it, no matter if there’s an audience, lights or flashes. I spend the whole day doing it!
You came into the fashion industry because of an accident. Do you think your are a lucky person? (The journalist uses a Spanish expression that would be something like: “Do you think you have a star behind you?”)
My fans gave me a star with my name as a present, so literally, yes! :)
Seriously, I think I’m a lucky girl ’cause I know what I want and I’m determined to get it. The way to it wasn’t easy, nothing was given to me easily, and I would probably say I was in the worst situation, more than any other person, so the option of not trying it doesn’t exist.
When people say I got into fashion by an accident and stuff like that, it seems I’m here by casualty, but the truth is that the accident was a real drama. In few years I broke my feet twice in five different sides, had problems with food, grew up spending too much time alone and suffer from insomnia, anxiety and five fobias. Everything in my life has always been so extreme.
Don’t know if I’m lucky, but if I think of it, getting the point I am right now it’s a miracle itself. Everything I have has costed me everything I had.
Matt Shefield was the talent-hunter that saw you. What does he mean to you? What do you remember of that moment?
I remember I was going back home after breaking my foot, and my momm brought me those beautiful shiny stilettos as a present. I tried them and started to walk down the hospital. My doctor was a very important sports doctor, and everytime I went there I used to be with artists, sportsman, famous people, and I have to recognize I loved it.
That day he went with a friend and found me walking with my new stilettos while my dad went to take the car. He stopped me and asked: ‘Are you a model?’ I said yes and he continued: ‘Do you want to be?’ and then I asked: ‘Will you pay me well?’. He said he would if I passed the audition, and, even with my mother’s dissaproval, I did. I passed the audition with that shoes, which were the only ones I had and I haven’t ever touched them since then because I think they bring me luck and I don’t want to break them!
I was 14, until then I had only made two commercials and one photoshoot when younger, and he took me to a studio with photographer Víctor Cucart, and Gloria Farr that was after that my stylist. She took a Versace, Bagaglia made my make up and I made my first photoshoot. I was that nervous that I decided not to do it again. I broke my promise when I saw the money.
I told Matt that I would spend the money on releasing my first album and I made half of it. I decided the best was paying the degree and become a producer, and then release the album. Everything took a little more time than what I have planned when I was 14.
Why do you want to be in music industry right now that it’s so hard?
Because I can’t give up on making my dream come true, no matter how hard it gets.
The reality is that I haven’t came into music, it’s just that now I have the chance to do it and show it. I’ve always been ‘the girl in the headphones’. I went everywhere wearing them and with my notebook, but that was all. Now there’s people listening.
I have to still believe I can do it. Not trying would be the worst option, I would disspoint myself and many people that believe in me. I need music, it’s my lifestyle, it’s the way I express myself…
What do you expect of your musical career?
In a personal level, I want to feel free, but the most important is leaving something good in this world. I’d love to make somebody happy, if it was only just one person I would feel great. I would love that somebody decided to go on because of my music, the same way I did with Michael Jackson’s music, that somebody fell in love with one of my songs or that one of the silly things I write would make somebody fall in love with another one. I was very happy the day a girl said to me that ‘Stupid Groupie’ is her favourite song. I never forget anybody’s face when they say something like that to me.
You had a music teacher who said you would never be able to do this. What would you say to him?
I would be very polite saying nothing, but the day he said that in front of all my classmates whas horrible to me.
We made a psychological test that showed up our skills, just to choose the lessons we wanted to take for the next year. I was the only one who had the test that showed artistical skills, and he recommended me it was better for me to forget about it. He said that, to be an artist, you needed to know someone, be beautiful and rich. I insisted a lot that I would be an artist one day, and that I would sing, because I loved it and was good at it.
When I went back home, some girls hit me and broke my discman, my biggest treasure at that time, and Michael Jackson’s ‘History Book 1′. It scratched and I went back home just been able to listen to ‘You are not alone’. I held my tears until I was in my room for my mother not to notice.
After releasing ‘Irresistible’, I went one day to the school and left the single and a picture of my yearbook with a note that said: ‘I told you’. Maybe it wasn’t ok, but it was like if I had avoided another hitting some years before, because I don’t really know what happened. I wasn’t really popular, but I didn’t piss anyone off, so I didn’t understand anything. Now I understand. Knowing what I am and what I want to do, makes me much powerful.
What is the best of your time in fashion?
I’ve learned a lot in the business and it helps me a lot when I’m in front of a camera. But, no doubt, the best was having anorexia. When I got to the limit I knew how distorted was reality in my head and that I don’t care what others think about what I want.
It’s hard, but I say this to people who felt despised because they wanted something different than the others.
I used make up to be beautiful for the others, I put weights into my vagina to weight what the nurses wanted, and I used to change my big hospital clothes that disimulated my illness to put really adjusted clothes that showed up how thin I was for bookers. It seems I was acting perfectly for the others, but that was killing me. Then you understand you’re perfect when you feel ok, no matter how you are.
I healed because I wanted. I started eating, left fashion, and went to college to become a producer and make my dream come true.
What is like being known as ‘The Goddess’?
Bipolar problem, because no one of the people who know me would name me like that.
It’s something I never think of, to be honest. I know it cames from a photographer, but the truth is that, as much, I’m the chaos goddess.
It’s not worthy, and it’s not good because he wasn’t talking about beauty and that’s what everybody thinks. It depends on what you like, and the normal thing is to think ‘It’s not that much’, and the truth is that I’m not.
What about your artistic name, Paytem Jane. What do you want to express with it?
Since I was little everybody called me ‘Paytom’ and I hated it because I thought it was a boy’s name. In public, I asked everyone to use my first name, because it was easier to me surviving behind Monica. In fact, I’ve been my whole life remembering everybody ‘Monica is my name’. It was an armour, but music has made me find myself and now there is nothing I feel ashamed of. My name’s not feminine, but I can still be sexy.
In the other hand, only my grandmother and my warriors support me in my career, support what I really am, and I think I’m much more honest with them this way. I’m myself!
Paytem, with ‘e’, means ‘warrior’, so I changed it because of the warriors, and I’m using the name of the person that has always loved me for what I am, who I didn’t share surnames with. She has always showed me her love for music, wanted to sing, see her name in an album cover, and she will!
Now I keep on telling everyone: ‘My name is Paytem Jane’
Between 2000 and 2005, your life happens in France, Italy and Germany, is that the reason why you sing in English? Will we be able to hear you singing in Spanish?
Maybe. I was about to record the first one, but it wasn’t the moment. I’m sure one day it will happen.
I started writting in English when I was 7 because of three reasons: because I wanted to sing for everyone, because the boys I used to write about where English-speakers, and because me and my best friend were the only two in our classroom who were able to speak English and I didn’t want anyone to know what was written on it if one day my notebook was stolen.
How woud you define your music?
Indefinable. It’s so personal. I try to sing everything I love, everyting that makes me emotional and makes me feel something. Every song needs its arrangement and they are really, really different between them. When I close the album, I will search the reasons why I wrote them and make them be a part of an all.
My mom didn’t want me to be an artist, but I was born in 85, and I was on the back seat when she played Boney M in the car, along with Abba, The Beatles, Roxette, Madonna, Fangoria… It was like feeding the monster.
But you’ve sang songs like ‘Caro Mio Ben’. Do you consider yourself a versatile artist?
If I say ‘no’, my producers will kill me, because I’m driving them crazy because of this. I love music, I touch everything, and they sometimes lose me.
My grandmother has always played opera and zarzuela (Spanish classical music) since I was very young, and I seriously love it!
I don’t know what songs will finally come out, but they say: ‘We cannot release this, this is not what your fans expect from you’, and I say: ‘Yes, well, we’re making it anyway’.
You’ve released two singles: ‘Irresistible’ and ‘Stupid Groupie’. When are you releasing your first album?
Somebody will hate me for this, but I hope I will happen one day next year… If it depended on me, we could release 3 albums the day after tomorrow, but there’s always burocracy outside the project that makes everything harder. Releasing is not as easy as it seems, as I thought. There is always any problem.
We’ve seen you singing ‘Born this way’. Will there be any versions in your album?
No. I sang ‘Born this way’ because I was asked to it. But no, I need to do and feel what I sing. And I have enough by trying to get some space to my songs.
The day I sang ‘Born this way’ I noticed it’s not mine, no matter how identified I can fell with the song. The song starts saying ‘my mom told me when I was young we all born superstars’, and while I said that I realised I couldn’t be singing a biggest lie, because anyway it would have be me who said that to my mum.
You’ve got your official webpage, and the fanclub one, but there are many more webpages dedicated to you. How do you feel about all that support?
Very happy, but most of all, very proud of my warriors because I think they do this because they understand all this and feel a part of me. I’m really thankful because I can share my dream with them, because it wasn’t easy fighting alone until now and they make me feel stronger. My dream is that we can leave something together and that they are themselves, no matter what. I would love to make their dreams come true through mine, and that I was the only one who had to suffer all the hitting, the hard times to make them free.
I feel proud because they know what they want and fight for it with me, and that makes them powerful. They express what they want, we’re free. It’s like an army united by love. They support me, I represent them.
How did you came up with the idea of writting a blog in English telling what you’re living?
Because I need direct contact with my fans because, if I want them to live this dream with me, I have to keep them informed! They help me. I even asked for advice to choose my dress in the last event! I need them!
Model, dancer, writer, singer, producer… What’s left to do or what would you like to do?
I’m really nervous and when I can’t go on with music, I entertain myself. I’m starting to design some clothes, but just as a hobby, because I always end tunning every outfit my own way. What’s serious, are the videoclip screenplays, if they are, and the choreographies, that i try then to be as I imagined them when I wrote the song. I choose everyting I can, even the lights. I the end I have a problem and I need to do everything personally and supervise what I couldn’t do since the beginning, but I still need to learn everyting!!
If you had to choose between fashion and music, what would you choose?
If there is any doubt, music ;)
A dream to make come true?
Just one? Mmm, I want to make a worldwide tour with my songs, but for now, just that somebody feels identified with one of my songs is enough.
A role model?
Nobody, because nobody has ever made what I want from the poin I was in.
Kissing people. When I have someone I trust in, I cant avoid! And buying shoes.
Last book you read?
Federico Moccia’s ‘ Scusa Ma Ti Voglio Sposare’
Can’t go out without…
Sunglasses and iPhone.
A lucky charm?
My sennheiser and the warrior’s bracelet.
What do you do before getting into the stage or the runway?
It’s been a while that I don’t get into a runway, but anyway, I wasn’t really excited about it, so I just simply waited for my moment with my headphones between all the people that were running as crazy and making up all the time.
Before singing, I say bye until I get to the stage to my dancers and background singers, I stay alone in a room listening to music and, just before I get out, I make up my lips.